seven things.

• The marriage books are right: make time for each other, learn good communication skills, talk about issues, be nice to each other... All obvious but really important.

• Practice on the small stuff - who will wash the dishes, who will vacuum the floor - because bigger issues are coming and you need to have the skills to deal with them. (Paying for someone else to clean your house in the pre-kid stage may not help you long term.)

• Flatmates are easier to live with than spouses. Don't think your marriage will be fine just because you lived together for a couple of years.

• Money doesn't fix things.

• A career won't make you happy.

• Kids won't keep you together.

• It really sucks when it all falls apart.

We're sorry (so, so sorry) but unsurprised.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4 eLove is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it jis not irritable or resentful;2 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 mLove bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,endures all things.