I've been wondering lately if there is something in the traditional question/answer bible study format that is unhelpful for women, and for young mums in particular. Here's what I'm thinking:
1. Understanding the bible is often unavoidably abstract. Yes, we try to earth things and application must be thoroughly done, but you can't get away from the fact that nutting out what the text actually says can be hard, intellectual work. If the group is to work it out together, everyone will need to concentrate.
I live in the world of ideas. I like abstractions. But most women don't. Especially women with babies and little kids. It is very hard to concentrate at bible study when you've got a baby on your breast and you can hear your toddler screaming outside. Even if your kids are bigger, you've arrived at bible study after a hectic and frustrating morning, getting everyone ready for school, the washing done, lunches made, weetbix split... Hard to be in a frame of mind to sit and think when you're exhausted with the effort its taken just to get there.
2. Women hate disagreeing with eachother. We even find discussion difficult if there are competing ideas. A question/answer study format will necessarily include this. And however nicely we ask, when there is a question there is always the possibility of a wrong answer.
3. As women, we are very good at intimidating one another. The comparison thing is a killer. We feel inadequate because we are not as smart, thoughtful, competent, creative, nice, attractive, fashionable, godly, whatever as the other women around us. (The 'nice' one is my particular struggle. I'm less nice than almost anyone else I know. And surely nice-ness matters more than the other things!) As many women feel that their brains came out with their baby's placenta, there are great opportunities for feelings of intellectual inferiority. As we talk about our weeks and compare what we've done, there are opportunities for feelings of incompetence etc. It's possible for every single woman to leave bible study feeling like they never want to go back.
Some questions to consider.
1. Is meeting together mid week to look at the bible in a group important? Why/why not?
2. Would one-to-one be a better thing to focus on?
3. Is the traditional question/answer thing best? Why not a talk, a 'devotion' (I so hate that word!), or an extended bible reading? Why not more a desks-in-line classroom thing with a teacher out the front and everyone doing individual worksheets? (just tossing in ideas!) Why not all listen to an online talk during the week and then just have a prayer meeting?
I'd love any ideas. We need to be speaking the word of God to eachother and praying for eachother. How we do it doesn't matter. So how can we make it work for women?
Can't really help you much on this one - I like the 'traditional' format and I don't have kids - always knew I was different. :-) I'm assuming you have asked the rest of the ladies in the group for their input.
ReplyDeleteAnd you think you're the least nice of anyone you know? Bwhahahaha - you have a long way to go to match me, youngling. :-) Anyway, surely Godly is more important than nice?
If I have one New Year's Resolution, it's to put myself and others down less.
You've got some great insights on this. I'm sure personality is a big part of how people cope with the kind of Bible studies you're talking about. I know people who thrive on going to the one at our church, but it just about killed me (which was not because there was anything wrong with the bible studies etc).
ReplyDeleteA thought I've had is that it could be meet for a bookclub that goes through good christian books (I know it's not the bible, but bear with me!). That way women can do most of the hard work (reading) at home when they get a chance, and then come together for discussion / prayer, possibly in someone's house so that toddlers screaming in creche don't come into the equation.
I think women find it easier to disagree with someone who isn't in the group (ie the author of the book) and there are lots of great books that would direct people back to the bible, but give a framework for practical application that might be helpful to addle-minded mums (me!).
I know you couldn't do that all the time, but I think it could be a helpful thing sometimes.
Lucy, can I ask why you struggled so much with yours?
ReplyDeleteYou sure can ...
ReplyDeleteI'll email you.
Coming to this discussion a bit late... but I've found this is a real problem in the 'real world' (ie. outside ES!) generally, not just in a women's group. In my experience, unless people have a background in uni ministry, they easily feel very intimidated by the leader, feel stupid, feel that the study is pointless etc. For this reason I have found text-heavy studies such as the Matthias Media ones next to useless for church bible study. My only solution is to work hard on doing simple but creative studies that engage just one issue or one short passage, in a way that grapples with the text and with people's lives, without boring the know-it-alls out of their brains! My aim is to think about how to run a study where everyone's gifts are brought to bear on interpreting and applying scripture - not everyone is going to enjoy teasing out a passage, but everyone has something to contribute to the broader work of reading, marking and inwardly digesting! In that sense, I think you have to write your study for your people...
ReplyDelete(Hey Simone - I accidently found your blog looking for someone else's and found your thoughts v stimulating)
ReplyDeleteI'm sure I am up there with you Simone on the bluntness / intimidating scale of things, so your topic is something that I have also thought of wrt women's bsgs.
I don't think classroom style would help the intimidation thing (are you kidding?!) but I have wondered about one-to-one working instead. The big group obviously has its advantages (creche, pooling of ideas, supporting each other etc).
Our group found the "Introducing God" format worked really well because it was very 'normal' to get together with friends, watch something together, and then sit around and chat about it with coffee and food. People were much more willing to share their ideas.
The other thing that seemed to really help was reading the passage aloud, then each reading it alone and writing down one main point and one question by yourself. Seemed to give people so much more confidence in discussion.
Hmm, so I'm not sure I am really engaging with your deeper questions, but there's some ideas anyway, and I look forward to seeing if are any other comments.
hey Tori!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you couldn't be intimidating! Can't write properly now, but I'll do a new post on this topic soon.
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Hi there,
ReplyDeleteYou have raised exactly some of the concerns I and the other young mums at my church have. We are currently trying to find a way that we can meet our kids needs and our spiritual needs at the same time. We began the year in a study with older women, with one of the mums outside with the kids. It hasn't worked too well for us. Like you say, the traditional format really does have its drawbacks, so we thought it was time to try something new.
One thing I think we might end up trying is a bible playgroup - mums chatting about the bible (using the church supplied Q&A study!)standing around the backyard while the toddlers play! We are more or less forced to try something like this, as we don't have any options for babysitting/creche (unless one of a small number of mums sits out - uncool). Naturally it will be a lot more informal than your traditional study, but I think that if we each come away having prayed, and been prayed for, with one bible truth for the week, then it has been a success.
I'd be really interested to hear any other ideas, or what others have tried because we are really at a quandry over how to proceed. Like you say, we know that the tratitional format hasn't worked for us... so what will? We'd even appreciate prayer for this, as we do need guidance as to a format that will work for us.
Bless you!