sayings to live by

'This too shall pass'

Honoria mentioned this saying in the comments section of Jean's blog post: 'the seasons of life'. Here's the legend behind it...

"King Solomon once searched for a cure against depression. He assembled his wise men together. They meditated for a long time and gave him the following advice: Make yourself a ring and have thereon engraved the words 'This too will pass.' The King carried out the advice. He had the ring made and wore it constantly. Every time he felt sad and depressed, he looked at the ring, whereon his mood would change and he would feel cheerful" -(Israel Folklore Archive # 126) (from wiki)

I like it. And not just as a cure for depression - in times of ease, of joy, of wealth, of strength, of nappies, of homework, of church crisis's, of temptation... we do well to remember it and stay patient and humble. On this side of eternity, life is transitory. This too will pass.

Here's another phrase I like. Thought alot on the idea a couple of years ago.

'This, too, is grace'

Everything. Happiness, ill health, that slow driver in front of you... This, too, is our loving father's sovereign care of us.

Teachers Meme

Nicole tagged me for this teachers meme (which Michael started). I need to name my five favourite teachers and say what made them great.

Ms Theideke read Wordsworth's 'Daffodils' to us. I sat up and listened. She read the 'Lucy Poems' and I lost my heart.

Mrs Ghetzel taught me maths from year 10-12. She showed me the beauty of a quadratic equation and taught me that it's okay to be passionate about anything. I haven't seen her for 15 years and can't imagine that she's still alive. She lived on cigarettes and coffee.

Mr Cummings was my instrumental music (trumpet) teacher from year 6 to 12. He was ex-army and a great concert band conductor. Under his leadership, our lowly state school band could beat the GPS schools in competitions. But more than that, he would patiently listen to my prattle hour after hour, week after week, year after year...

To this day I'd acknowledge Keith Birchley as my most influential teacher. I met him in my first week of uni - a young christian from a non-Xn family, hungry for the word - and he patiently, passionately and skillfully taught me the bible. He also showed me how God works in weakness and that the desperate state of my heart is no obstacle for God.

Hmm. Last one. Mark Baddeley almost got a look in - he was a fantastic doctrine teacher even at uni. But I guess I have to put down my Mum. Mum's a legend. Taught me most things: to live, to walk, to speak (no small task, I've got some bad genes), to write, to construct an argument...

So thanks to all of you.

That was fun. I tag: ben, craig, jo and you if you like!

I'm a princess, sweet and fair...

I've just read Kerri Newmarch's very thorough article 'Look at me! I'm a Princess' (thanks Ali) which analyses princess culture* both in and outside the church. The article concludes by advising us to be cautious in using princess themes in our ministries to children.

It's got me thinking. I wonder if my little song 'I'm a knight' (from J is for Jesus) is leading kids astray. For the uninitiated, here it is:

I'm a Knight

I’m a knight from long ago
If you’re in trouble, let me know.
I’m brave as brave and strong as strong
I ride my horse and sing my song

La, la, la. La, la, la.
I’m a knight from long ago
La, la, la. La, la, la.
If you’re in trouble, let me know.

I’m a princess sweet and fair
With sparkling eyes and golden hair
I’m kind and loving all day long
I dance around and sing my song.

La, la, la. La, la, la.
I'm a princess sweet and fair,
La, la, la. La, la, la.
With sparkling eyes and golden hair.

But Jesus is the best of all
He heals the sick and helps the small
He’s brave and strong, he is our king
He loves us more than anything

La, la, la. La, la, la.
Jesus is the best of all.
La, la, la. La, la, la.
He heals the sick and helps the small. **

© 2007 Simone Richardson

We've used it quite a bit in school RE ('scripture' for those in NSW), play group, and kids club, but always with my very un-princessey theology surrounding it. I've never told any little girl that she's God's princess. We do knight and princess dress ups, tell a few heroic stories, and then explain that Jesus is far better than any of that.

But the song is out there now. I wonder if it's being used to promote ideas that I don't share. Not that there's much I can do...


* Basically, 'princess culture' is telling little girls (and grown women too) that they are God's princesses. So special, beautiful etc etc. Kerri Newmarch argues that it promotes vanity and narcissism. I agree.

** I wrote another verse for this song which I sometimes use, even though the big and mean emu management :-) wouldn't let it go on the cd (for the feeble reason that it's got nothing to do with Jesus!) Here it is for anyone who's interested:

I’m a dragon from the mire,
My claws are sharp, my breath is fire
I’m sad and lonely as you see,
‘Cause everyone’s afraid of me!

La, la, la. La, la, la (etc)

the power of my love

Women often complain that men try to fix things. We tell them how we're feeling about something, and they come up with a 3 point plan to solve the problem. But that's not what we want. We just want somebody to listen and understand.

But it's not just men who have a tendency to try to fix things. I think we women are just as likely to be Miss or Mrs. Fixit as our husbands and brothers are to be Mr. Fixit - only we don't offer a three point plan as the solution, we offer our love.

When the kids were little and they hurt themselves, I'd say "Come here, sweetie, Mummy'll kiss it better." It (mostly) worked. My kisses had healing power! My love was able to fix their troubles! What power!

It was a sad day when our youngest declared "kisses don't make it better!" At two years of age he'd stopped believing in the power of my love. But to this day, I'm still a believer. Yesterday, our almost 7 year old told me how a boy at school doesn't like him. My immediate answer was to say "I like you!" He looked at me as if I'd just changed the topic (as I had). I wanted my love to fix his problem, but while it may have helped him bear it, it didn't actually provide a solution.

I don't think it's just kids we try to 'fix'. Before we were married, how many of us thought that love would be able to fix problems in our husbands? Jane Eyre (it's always a good time for a J.E. illustration!) believed that her love for Rochester would heal his deep childhood hurts and cure him of his dissipated lifestyle. In novel-land, of course, it could - but in real life? Unlikely.

When I think about it, the power-of-my-love is an awfully arrogant thing to believe in. Yet I persist in believing in it. Why?

Perhaps because it's kind-of true. There is comfort in being loved. When we love our husbands, kids and friends it does beef them up a little to endure the difficulties that come their way. But does it fix things? Not really. Our love is just balm on the skin.

God's love is, of course, the true fix-it offering deep healing and the hope of new bodies which will no longer be hurt.

some wisdom

"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise." Proverbs 10:19

So why am I blogging?

parenting formulas

Child Minding Capability Formulas for Mums
n = number of children you have

Number of children easy to look after = n-1

Number of children you can care for in a creche situation = 2n + 1

Number of children you are capable of looking after for an extended period (ie. a day) = 2n


Time Out For Mum Formulas

Dad takes the kids out for an adventure. When should he return?

time when Mum is not ready to see husband and kids again = eta - x (when x > 10 minutes)

time when Mum is sort of ready to see husband and kids = eta

time when Mum will want to see husband and kids = eta + 3 hours *

time when Mum will really want to see husband and kids = eta + 6 hours *

time when Mum will be desperate to see husband and kids
= eta + 2 hours ** OR
= eta + 8 hours*

* assuming there has been assurance that everyone is safe and that bedtime has not been compromised
** assuming NO phone contact


[Attempts have been made to calculate Dad formulas, but there seems to be too wide a variance in results to compile meaningful data at this stage.]

Thoughtlessness

If it were possible to ingest one's own foot
I'd have done it.
My soapbox against your latest passion,
Claims that pants like that are out of fashion.
I forgot your birthday, called your mum a cow.
If feet were smaller, I'd have swallowed one by now.

Clueless doesn't nearly sum it up.
I'm the friend you can trust to say
the One Wrong Thing.
Call for winter weather in the spring,
Suggest the cake you've eaten is enough,
I deliver insults off the cuff.

Tact is not my gift.
Diplomacy, poise all escape me
and toenails scratch my heart.
Still, as I make thoughtlessness an art,
know that this is true:
My thoughts are never far away from you.

SAR 2008

It's amazing...

...how quickly an idea can become an obsession.

More Joy

For the last few days I've been thinking about joy. I know all of the regular definitions but the state that they describe seems somewhat elusive. Right now I'm thinking it's a combination of thankfulness and contentment. I'm looking forward to reading Jerry Bridges ideas in his book The Fruitful Life (thanks Jean).

But here's what I'm thinking about in the mean-time. During his earthly life, how did Jesus experience/express joy?

Any ideas?

As You Go

It's funny how we cannot say goodbye
You laugh, agree to send the latest news
I say I'll write but know that it's a lie
Who cares for worn out socks or outgrown shoes?

Our friends all look on, curious for clues
Presuming truth is told from eye to eye
But smiles attest, no hearts have blown a fuse
It's funny how we cannot say goodbye.

You say the final boarding call is nigh
I say, in leaving nobody can lose
The season comes, and birds will surely fly
You laugh, agree to send the latest news.

Like Noah, we march into the ark in twos
Before the clouds form heavy in the sky
If I had my way who knows what I would choose?
I say I'll write, but know that it's a lie.

The sun will set, come morning it will rise
It's not like heaven's choir has lost its muse
A holding glance, in unison a sigh
Who cares for worn out socks or outgrown shoes?

It's funny how we cannot say goodbye
Though smiles attest no hearts have blown a fuse
And though the final boarding call is nigh
Wrapped up to keep, a box of worn out shoes.

SAR 2008

Joy

Joy is an island surrounded by a sea of fear.

sar

why oh why...

... can't I just get on and do the work I need to do?

Philosophy with 11 year olds

I do a bit of work as a supply teacher. Today I scored a year 6/7 class. It was purely coincidental if anyone learnt any maths or english, because I don't remember teaching any. A few kids were way out of their trees and keeping them safe and the other kids safe from them was my priority.

This afternoon I was instructed to run a 'philosophy' lesson on stealing. I had a set of questions like: Is stealing wrong? Are there any situations in which stealing might not be wrong? If you find something, is it stealing to keep it? etc. We had a class discussion. I wasn't meant to offer answers, but just get the kids thinking about the issues.

It was eye opening. These kids have known nothing except post modernism and all but 2 kids were not happy with the idea that stealing is 'wrong'. Even the two who thought it was wrong wanted the definition of stealing narrowed considerably. Apparently if you find a wallet, it's okay to take the money out of it. If you find $1000 you are under no obligation to hand it in because no-one would know that you found it. Hmm.

I broke the rules at the end of the lesson and explained to the kids that in whatever situation we find ourselves, we should try to do the very best thing. Not just what we think we can get away with. I didn't think anyone heard what I said, but after school a boy came and put 5c on my desk. I questioned him about it, and he said 'Miss, that's what you said we should do!' I had to pick my jaw up from the ground.

Amazing.

Party Plan Evangelism?

I hosted a Tupperware party yesterday. Women flock to such things and spend an amazing amount of money on pieces of plastic. But it's not just plastic we're buying. We're buying hope. Hope that our pantries will suddenly become organised. Hope that we'll become better wives, mothers, women. Hope that our kids will be healthy - not poisoned by lower quality plastics. And it's all backed by Tupperware's life-time warrenty!

But I think the real reason why Tupperware works is because of its party plan sales scheme. The host gets 10% of the sales in gifts, and more if she can convince one or two of her friends to also have a party - thus spreading the joy further.

An idea. Maybe if we offered people at our church 'incentives' to host a gospel party, they'd be more keen. Free set of steak-knives anyone?

Playing Grown-Ups

I've had a busy last few months and the next term looks just as full. Now I don't really have a problem with busy - I think anyone who is actively involved in church life will be busy - it's what I've been busy with that concerns me. You see, I find it easy to fill up my time with wider church activities: running music for this conference, speaking at church x's evangelistic event, going to this women's conference, that campus committee...

I've just been invited to join the presbyterian church's committee for ministry training. It seems it would be a good thing to do - I'd get to hang with people I know and like, the group makes decisions that are important for the future of our denomination, and apparently this is the best run committee of the pcq. I can see I'd be a decent person to do the job - they're after a woman and I'm one of the few females in our denomination who know what the CMT is!

So what's the problem?

The problem is what Andrew calls 'playing grown-ups'. Because of our lack of faith, ministry in the local church seems unimpressive. Every week we do the same thing- bible study, church, morning tea, washing up, piano playing... it feels small scale and unimportant. But when I get asked to do something for the denomination or another Christian body? Now I'm playing with the big kids! This is grown-up ministry!

But it's not.

Grown up ministry is the day after day, month after month, year after year, patient teaching of the gospel to those around me. Knowing others. Having others know me. Loving others. Having others love me. I pray that I'll have the faith to remember this and not fill up my diary with ego-boosting other things.